Saturday, November 16, 2013

Dont try this!!

This week I am not posting my weight officially. I was down seven pounds. BUT, before the applause and cheering comes, I want to share how it happened.

Do NOT try this at home!!!

Short version:
I didn't eat. On Monday, I literally had no food. Tuesday I had two diet cokes, and a caramel flavored coffee something or other. I didnt do this to lose weight. I did this because of stress, and I didn't know how to cope.

Long version:
The last six months have been very stressful at the doctors office. I wont give any details or examples because of privacy issues. There is a person in a higher position who, when first hired four years ago, became a very good friend. Within the last six months I became aware that he was lying about me to my boss. I started documenting EVERYTHING I did that involved him.
I went to my boss, and confided in her and showed her some of my proof. She in turn confided in me that they knew he was lying (sigh of relief) and they, meaning she and her bosses, were gathering information and proof as well. He has quite a bit of responsibility and has been reprimanded and is on probation.

He continues to make my life miserable. But, I know that my job is not in jeopardy. Some days I handle it much better than others.

Several weeks ago, I wasnt able to sleep and I stopped eating.  The last day of the week, I broke down in tears.
My primary job is the registration clerk, and I am the first and last person the patients sees at the office. A teary eyed person does NOT make for good PR!!!

This week, I reached my flood of tears level again.
I got 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night, and I couldnt eat. I was sick to my stomach and had to force feed myself! On Wednesday I actually passed out at work. (thankfully I work at a doctors office!!) I received a "YOU NEED TO EAT" warning, so I came home and at a pound of Chocolate Covered Peanuts. Felt absolutely horrible and ended up in the bathroom all night into the morning!!

This weigh in isnt real. It doesnt count. On Friday I was still feeling 'yucky", but I knew I had to have nourishment. I made myself some fruit smoothies, and I drank my nourishment.
I need to learn coping skills!!!
Today, Saturday, is better. I have a plan for next week. I will post it tomorrow. For now, It may only be 845 PM, but Im going to bed.


  1. Girl we are a mess. Thank goodness we have each other and can get this figured out. I am so sorry about your week. I will be better at being there for you and also supporting you more. It's just no fair having to go to work and crying.
    We can do this, I'll be there more for you. I promise.

  2. I had a work situation many years ago where from my point of view, there was a plot against me by/with a supervisor, false allegations, intimidations, insinuations and all the other elements mixed together to make for a miserable work place situation. I documented everything as well. Before the supervisor could set the trap, I shared my truths with everyone in the line of command food chain, so everyone knew what had transpired and how I felt about it. At that point I thought...what is the worst that can happen to me...get fired? That is what the supervisor was trying to do anyway. The next afternoon...and a day after I had notified all in the food chain via email of what was going on...the Bureau Chief that was causing my grief announced her retirement effective in ten days. I don't know what transpired in the 24 hours between my email and her retirement announcement. I'm pretty sure it was forced upon her by the Department Administrators.

    I learned after the fact many months later, that the Department wanted to avoid a lawsuit and pushing her into retirement was the easiest way. A lawsuit hadn't even occurred to me. In hindsight...I could have been thousands of dollars richer had I known that was how they thought. So...if you feel your workplace rights as an employee are being violated...I suggest that you seek out a good attorney to learn what your legal rights are. Armed with knowledge is the best way to handle these situations.

  3. I just have to smile a bit. I TOTALLY understand the stress vs. food situation. When I was involved in a similar mess like Marc described, I lost almost 20 pounds in a few months. I left that job and got another, and gained 8 back in the first month.

    Since my cancer diagnoses, I've had no appetite - major nerve attack, I know! But I also know that I NEED to keep my strength up so that I can fight this beast, so I'm eating at least three times a day, good, nutritionally balanced meals. Smoothies are a life saver - filling, nutrient dense, and you can add protein powder or extra vitamins if necessary. They are also easy to get (and keep!) down when you're stressed. Just don't make them with ice cream! ha ha ha!!

    Big Hugs, my friend. Hang in there; it will all work out. Really. It will.

  4. I'm so sorry Debbie! That is a lot of stress to cope with. Work relationships can be hard, I've had many experiences there too, but none as stressful as yours sounds like. I hope and pray things will get better and that your co-worker will feel the "need" to look for work else where. ((HUGS))